(1) Stockholm Syndrome should be Renamed the Singapore Syndrome
So many grouses leading up to polling day – housing prices, COE prices, food prices, unemployment, strange foreigners, too many foreigners, Amos Yee… and the PAP won by a bigger margin. Instead of punishing the ruling party, most Singaporeans thought “Actually, Teo Chee Hean can be pretty handsome…” Which brings us to
(2) Social Media Counts for Squat (Unless You’re Baey)
Touted as the tool to bring down a “tyrannical” government, and made infamous by the Egyptian Spring, criticisms came fast and furious as keyboard warriors soldiered away. But apparently, the minority takes to Facebook and Twitter to express their grouses, judging by the 69 percent that were amused by our firecracker of a PM, but thought, “nehmind lah…”
(3) If You Tell Someone Something Often Enough…
They’ll believe it, or at least half believe it. In the land of the death, the fella who shouts the loudest and longest is king. One word: AHPETC. Bad WP, badder WP, super bad WP. Doesn’t matter whether the figures are right, bad WP. And somehow it worked, or at least to an extent. Why put Ah Low in jail and waste taxpayers’ money? But…
(4) Big Noise Don’t Mean Big Votes
20,000 at Hougang, another 20,000 at Simei, and at Bedok? A whopping 40,000 people! While that turnout spurred the Workers’ Party on, it wasn’t enough to swing the vote in their favour, losing Punggol East and faring worse in Hougang and Aljunied, while East Coast anf Marine Parade sat back and voted “nah”. In comparison, Tan Chuan-Jin and Woody didn’t even hold a rally. How the hell did they pull off a win of over 60 percent?
(5) Walking the Talk when Walking the Ground
“But the kind aunty shook my hand and patted by butt as encouragement.” Almost all the opposition teams were quietly confident but received a rude shock that their experiences walking the ground didn’t translate into the actual vote. That means somebody wasn’t walking the talk, and we mean YOU, smiling aunty. Years of groundwork somehow just fade into oblivion when Lucky Charles just waltzes into Punggol East, turns on the charm, and wins.
(6) Clean Politics is an Ideal, and a Myth
Poor Dr Chee got whacked left, right and centre by hokkien-peng Sim Ann, overspender Dr Vivian, PM Lee, and Lawrence “help me out here” Wong, and they all won by even bigger margins in their constituencies compared to 4 years ago. And again, AHPETC. Politics is a dirty game. Personal choice time: Is it better to go down a hero or earn a million bucks a year as a villain?
(7) Pissing Off People Isn’t a Bad Thing
What good is it to win the world alone, when you can do that and piss off people in the process? Ask Minister “Heng ah we’re not China or Malaysia”, not to be confused with Minister Heng.
(8) Too Many Chiefs Spoil the Vote
What do you get when all the colours of the rainbow converge in one dot? White lah. It’s called refraction of light. Good candidates with a “heart for the people” and the brains to match are hard to come by, and we saw some dispersed across the rainbow opposition. Others were just total nut jobs. We also heard much of the opposition campaign on about the same issues at rallies. So if these were common concerns, better then to band together like the WP’s Aljunied A-Team rather than let the PAP rip asunder at the polls?
(Bonus) Elder Lee is Right
The PAP raised LKY so many times in the lead-up to the polls, just short of raising him from the dead. And if you don’t know it by know, a dead LKY can outlast 20 men in a political battle. And win. Because he’s a badass.