Cow Beh Cow Bu

Super Dumb Singaporean Paradoxes in Reasoning that Gave the PAP a Landslide Victory

Paradox: a statement that apparently contradicts itself and yet might be true, or wrong, at the same time.

And for those who argued for change and thought they could get change without changing anything, we hear that knocking your head against a brick wall can cure headaches.

Here’s some Singaporean paradoxes in reasoning that gave the swing the shove it needed.

Before Polls: Absolute power corrupts absolutely
During Polls: But maybe OUR gahmen can ownself check ownself

BP: We need more opposition voices in parliament!
DP: But better the opposition come from other GRC lah, not ours

BP: Going to a Workers’ Party rally really makes me feel like a TRUE BLUE Singaporean
DP: But PAP supporters are more civilised and not so chor lor so vote PAP better

BP: Dr Chee Soon Juan is changed man, a hero, and someone to lead Singapore into the future
DP: But he was a gangster 15 years ago. I think mai lah…

BP: Because of bloody gahmen over the past 20 years, now cost of living is too high
DP: But the gahmen has a track record that no one else has

BP: We want more free speech, more freedom, more free…
DP: We shall exercise our free speech by voting in the people who deny us free speech (but give us free money)

BP: Stupid Minister go and laugh at Malaysia for what…
DP: But actually hor, we also always laugh at Malaysia and we can’t be wrong, so he must be right, right?

BP: The gahmen should support poor people like my grandama who everyday collect cardboard, complain leg pain, back pain…
DP: But like that then people everyday sit back and shake leg and want me to live off my tax money ah?

BP: How dare this bloody Ch** B** gahmen threaten me and say no vote means no upgrading
DP: But better vote for them otherwise no upgrading

BP: LKY is a tyrant, a liar and a…
DP: I love LKY



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